One of my many irritating habits is finding the exception that DISproves the rule.
More kindly, I tend to see both sides of a coin.
As an example, someone said in a group, “Well, if I’m feeling emotional, then I always know it’s trauma in me that needs to be healed.” And of course, sometimes that’s accurate. Other times you’re just feeling emotional. It might not even be your emotion, if you happen to be sensitive.
Once we see the other possibilities, the first statement becomes toxic (change the “always” to “sometimes” and it is helpful). Toxic because it suggests emotion is a problem, and that no worldly circumstance could ever provoke emotion – but how does that person think her trauma began?
What idea (yours or someone else’s) have you noticed that might be helpful if it is one tool in the box, but becomes toxic when it’s taken as truth without question? Where have you started to see the other side of the coin?
With Love, Sara
